Nine Years

I met Geoff when I was just twenty. Intense and instant attraction hit me. We met on a Sunday and were on our first date that Friday. What surprised me was the bond we formed so quickly—I’m talking within a few hours—on our first date. It was so familiar and comfortable, the way you feel when you are hanging out with an old and dearest friend.

No games, either. We wanted to see each other the next day and so we did. We wanted to see each other the day after that, but he had to go out of town. But every day after that until we were married seven months later, we saw each other. (The next time we had to be apart was three years into our marriage—and it was only a day.)

Yes, seven months from our meeting until our marriage. My mother freaked out three weeks into our dating, urging me to not get so serious at twenty years of age. In this day of two year long engagements after several years’ courtship, it seems foreign; some think it isn’t enough time. After dating a few loser guys and a few great guys, I knew what I didn’t want, and more importantly, what I did want. (Just to clear anything up, I’m pretty sure that Geoff is my Mom’s favorite child now.)

So shall I start my list? You know: the list of all the wonderful things about my husband? Geoff will not want me to…but I’m going to anyway.

For starters, the shallow things: beautiful dark hair, the prettiest shade of blue eyes, fantastic lips (I do love kissing my man), incredible long arms to match his 6’4” stature, and the most wonderfully shaped, strong legs I’ve ever laid eyes on. I can’t pass him in the hall without touching him. It ranges from a kiss, to a swat on the bum, to even a high five. Touch. Maybe that is one of those things that help us connect when there isn’t always enough time in the day to talk for more than the five minutes.

Not to hurt any person’s feelings, who may be reading this that also spends time outside blog world with me…but there is nobody I’d rather hang out with than Geoff. Yes, I like hanging out with ladies, but Geoff: I love spending my time with him. On those nights when we don’t have church or work things going on, and the girls go to bed at seven, I get to have date night with him. Life is good.

His intelligence is the first thing I noticed when listening to him; to this day he amazes me. He is quick and discerning and has an incredible ability to look at a problem, see at least three solutions and their paths, and choose the best one. He also sees people for who they are right away. I don’t always like that. I like to see all people as good. He sees what is real at the moment and I see hope for what a person can become. Good balance.

His humor was what I noticed on our date. Because he is quick and discerning, his humor is equal. I find a person’s humor (not just what they can recite from the latest movie) is equal to their intelligence. Geoff has always been able to make me laugh. And of course, he laughs at all my jokes, so I know he’s funny…

Geoff is an incredible father. We have different parenting styles, but we have the same expectations, values and theories on parenting, nurturing and family. He listens to them, talks with them, tries (we’re talking three and six year olds!) to reason with them. He is gentle, patient, forgiving, understanding and doting. What our daughters need, he can give. I have seen him only get upset a few times in all the time I’ve known him, and it was because he thought he was too hard on his girls. Wow. And he is much more kind than I.

This past year and a half has tested us through migraines, headaches that are almost always with me. I suppose if we took a calendar since they started in July 2007, we wouldn’t spend much time counting up the days that I wasn’t sick from migraines. This isn’t a pity party, by the way. (I’m over that.) But I want to express to Geoff how grateful I am that he has held our small, but very important, family together. I have been awful to live with most of the time. Self-involved, in pain, grumpy, sleeping, whining, vomiting into bowls that he always cleaned up. He was always making dinner, cleaning up and putting the girls to bed. He was worrying with me when we didn’t know these were migraines (those were scary and very powerless times). He is still always listening to me, and we are talking constantly and trying to make sense of the patterns, medications and lifestyle changes that I need to have function back. It’s no easy task being married to me. At least not during this little hiccup in our family. But he has been incredible and endured this trial as a champion.

He works very hard for our family. He just finished graduate school last year and I am so proud of him for taking a risk, quitting his job when we were first married, and going to school full time until he finished in something he calls a career, instead of a job. He is very good at his job, he enjoys his job, and that makes a lot of difference for our family.

I love my Geoff. I am so grateful we found each other young in life and started our journey together on January 28, 2000. It is a privilege to call him my best friend, companion, lover and husband.

Happy Anniversary, Geoff. I love you.