Meltdown on Aisle Four Years Old

Two children. Parenting for six and a half years now. Today is the first day I've ever dealt with a public meltdown. (Some of you are rolling your eyes in jealousy right now, huh? Don't worry, I got mine today.)

The girls were fighting over which book to choose at Target so I told them (after reminding them to "negotiate" and "be nice" and "work together" too many times) that I was going to pick the book.

Well! That was not cool of me, I know this. I should have not been so tight with the wallet and let them choose their own books. But $15 a book? That just seemed a lot for a splurge that isn't their birthday. We're trying to save for a house. We need to do the library more often; I hear their books are free if you return them on time.

Back to the story:

Madeline let out a scream. You know the scream: legs together, arms straight down at sides, hands clenched in fury, shoulders push down and chest puffed out while an ear piercing scream ejects out of a usually cute face. The sheer volume of that pitch blurred all other senses. I picked up Madeline to try and reason with her but it did nothing.

So I put her in the cart, and we pushed our way to the front of the store. And yes: she was still screaming. Loud. It didn't stop.

We got to the front. I took her out of the cart and by the hand and we walked out. And yes: screaming all the way.

She quieted down momentarily out the door and I explained to her that her screaming was unacceptable and inappropriate for the store and that we had to leave.

Her screaming broke down temporarily into loud sobs in the elevator and to the car.

My mixed emotions broke into pity when she cried, "This is the worsest day ever!"

I helped her into the car and my pity for her shattered as she took all the rage she felt and screamed, once again, directly at me while I was getting her seat belt on. I shut the door and was amazed that the fury she felt was back on again.

I ignored her as we circled out of the parking lot. At this point she was realizing we weren't going back inside and that it was because of her screaming. The screaming eventually softened when the car hit the street and we drove home.

When she quieted down I told her that we all have bad days. I told her that it was unacceptable for her to scream like that in the store and that if we can't find nicer ways to express our feelings then we can't be in the store.

By the time we got home she was okay. I got her some chocolate milk to drink in a sippy. Oh, didn't you know this is a cure-all? Yes, if a child is tired and hungry --which is often what triggers these meltdowns-- a delicious and nutritious drink is easy to swallow and fills the belly enough to calm down. After the chocolaty goodness and a few strawberries, we planted thyme and tarragon in the herb pot, a clematis in the corner of the yard, and scattered various flower seeds in the beds of the front yard. All was forgotten and she was cheerful.

Madeline recovers quickly.

And where was Annalise while all this occurred? She was my grown-up kindergartner: composed and patient, quiet during the screaming, and consoling in the car to Madeline when it was time for some nurturing.

What book was I going to choose for them? Where the Wild Things Are by Maurice Sendak. Seems appropriate for this parental anecdote.