October

Is it really October?

I love Fall. Autumn. Harvest time. Halloween. I love it all. It's my favorite.

YOU: Tell me, what is your official order of preference for the seasons?

ME: Well, I'm so glad you asked. Because I just adore talking about myself. Truly. Okay so order of preference starting with my favorite: Fall, Spring, Winter, Summer.

YOU: Really? Summer is last? Most people love summer and have it on the top of their list.

ME: Well, I'm not most people. I'm pretty boring/ordinary, but I'm just not most people. I don't love summer. I hate heat.

YOU: Tell me more.

ME: Wow, you just said the one thing that makes me so happy. Because I love to talk. Kind of reminds me of that episode on 30 ROCK with the short segment of "Porn for Women." Here is the clip:




I know, 30 ROCK is one of the best. I also love Modern Family. Yeah, I still appreciate The Office, I dabble in Survivor, and I secretly watch Desperate Housewives when no one is looking (shhhh, don't tell); but 30 ROCK and Modern Family have me excitedly going to Hulu every now and again. Yeah, not watching it live anymore. We just don't watch enough television for me to justify paying that bill. Do I sound like a home-owner or what?!

So back to summer's heat. I really despise heat. Despicable heat. It gives me headaches. Bad ones. I get weak. Yup, I'm the opposite of Superman, who actually draws strength from the sun. (I learned that watching Smallville, another show I peruse.)

Also, my skin burns easily. And I try to protect my skin like a mother bear with her cubs. Plenty of sunscreen, year round. Sunglasses to not only protect my eyes, but the delicate skin around my eyes. I would like not to age too quickly, thank you very much.

I think it is a crime to allow tanning booths, like right up there with brothels and people who pronounce it "supposably."

I digress.

Fall is my favorite. Favorite colors, favorite smells, favorite clothes, favorite crisp air outside.

Then Spring. After a long winter I delight in the flowers starting to bloom, the temperatures flirting with warmth, and the rain. I love rain.

Winter. Snow. I live in a place where snow isn't a threat, it is a guarantee. Probably by Thanksgiving, maybe by Halloween. And then when does it melt? April. If not April, then definitely May. And then if it snows in June or July, it melts very quickly. But I do like the snow, for a while.

Summer. Dead last. Because of the heat. If I lived in a mild place, where the temperatures climbed to 75 in the peak of the day and didn't climb a degree and I had lovely shade trees...well then I might just bump Summer above Winter. But my placement of Fall and Spring still stand.

Thank you for listening to me. And I didn't even have to pay you. Do you feel taken?